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Health & Fitness

You Are Not Crazy

by Jessica Knight

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Latest episodes

  • Why Confusion Is the Real Damage in Coercive Control

    October 7, 2026 · 17 min

    In this episode I look at why confusion, not fear, is often the clearest sign that a relationship is built on coercive control. I walk through four patterns that show up again and again: the gap between how someone behaves in private…

  • Are They Trauma Bonded to You Too?

    September 30, 2026 · 19 min

    In this episode, I'm answering a question I get asked constantly: are they trauma bonded to me too? People ask this when the person who hurt them starts falling apart after a breakup or after being told no. The panic, the pleading, the…

  • The Lying Isn't an Accident: A Conversation with Anne Blythe from BTR.org

    September 23, 2026 · 59 min

    This week I'm joined by Anne Blythe, founder of BTR.org (Betrayal Trauma Recovery), an organization that has supported over 9,000 women navigating a partner's lying, gaslighting, infidelity, and manipulation. Anne shares her own story of…

  • Why I Stopped Trying to Decode Them

    September 16, 2026 · 14 min

    In this episode I talk about why emotionally abusive and coercive controlling relationships feel so disorienting, and why you end up spending so much time trying to decode behavior that was never actually confusing to begin with.  I…

  • Withdrawal, Not Grief: Understanding the Trauma Bond

    September 9, 2026 · 12 min

    This episode is a reframe. If you have already learned what a trauma bond is and how it forms, this is not that episode. This is about the specific pain of healing from one, and why that pain is so often misread as grief when it is…

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  • Dating After Abuse: Why My Answer Is "Traumatized"

    September 2, 2026 · 25 min

    Someone recently asked if I'm dating, and my honest answer was "traumatized." In this episode I talk about why that word fits better than a simple yes or no, why a recent connection activated me so quickly, and why my nervous system goes…

  • When Co-Parenting Isn't Safe: The Case for Parallel Parenting

    August 26, 2026 · 17 min

    I break down why parallel parenting is a communication strategy built specifically for high-conflict dynamics, not a failure of one. I talk about what it actually looks like in practice: handling your own parenting time independently…

  • Why Closure Is a Myth with Najwa Zebian

    August 19, 2026 · 58 min

    Najwa Zebian returns for a second conversation, and this one picks up exactly where the first left off. Her new book, The One Who Broke You Can't Heal You, comes out August 25th, and we talk through what it actually means to take…

  • Pattern Blindness: Why No One Believes You Until It's Too Late

    August 14, 2026 · 16 min

    In this episode I break down pattern blindness, one of the least talked about reasons survivors stay stuck in self-doubt. I explain why family court and even well-meaning friends tend to evaluate coercive control one incident at a time…

  • The Angry Daughter in Love

    August 12, 2026 · 18 min

    In this episode, I return to the angry daughter — but this time, I look at what happens when she tries to love someone. The survival skills that kept her intact in her family of origin are the same ones that quietly work against her in…

  • The Angry Daughter

    August 5, 2026 · 15 min

    In this episode, I reflect on what it actually means to be the angry daughter — the scapegoat, the truth-teller, the one who names what others refuse to see. Drawing from my own childhood and my experience as a mother, I trace the way…

  • Why You Keep Saying Sorry (Even When You Did Nothing Wrong)

    July 29, 2026 · 13 min

    In this episode, I'm talking about why self-blame becomes almost automatic when you've been in an emotionally abusive or coercively controlling relationship, and why it feels like relief even when it's actually costing you. I get into the…

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About the show

You know something is wrong. You just can’t always explain what it is. Why do you keep apologizing when you didn’t do anything wrong? Why can one nice interaction make you question months of mistreatment? Why do you rehearse conversations before you have them? Why are you still trying to make someone understand you when explaining yourself has never worked? Why does every individual incident sound small when the pattern has changed your entire life? You Are Not Crazy is a podcast about making sense of the relationship experiences that don’t make sense. I’m Jessica Knight, an emotional abuse coach and survivor. I take the confusing, contradictory, often ordinary-looking moments inside emotional abuse, coercive control, trauma bonds, narcissistic relationships, and high-conflict separation and slow them down so we can understand what is actually happening. We look beyond labels and individual incidents to the patterns underneath them: what a behavior does, what it gets you to do in response, what happens when you resist it, and what you eventually learn to believe about yourself. Because emotional abuse doesn’t only hurt. It can change the way you communicate, make decisions, respond to conflict, interpret other people’s behavior, and trust your own perception. Here, we talk about gaslighting, manipulation, trauma bonding, intermittent reinforcement, coercive control, high-conflict divorce, post-separation abuse, difficult co-parenting dynamics, and the process of rebuilding self-trust after a relationship that taught you to doubt yourself. But this isn’t a podcast about diagnosing every difficult person or telling you that every conflict is abuse. It’s about understanding the pattern. What happened? What did it make you do? Why did your response make sense at the time? And what changes once you can finally see the mechanism underneath it? You are not crazy. There is an explanation. Let’s find it. Learn more about Jessica’s work and resources at emotionalabusecoach.com.