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Pirates: Totalus Rankium podcast artwork
History

Pirates: Totalus Rankium

by Rob and Jamie
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Latest episodes

  • Pirate Semi 2

    October 10, 2026 · 35 min

    Our second Pirate Semi! Only one can go through to the final. Jamie and I take questions about the pirates from our wonderful patreons!

  • Pirate Semi 1

    September 23, 2026 · 37 min

    So we are in the first pirate semi (behave!) We have Blackbeard, Blackbart, Blackvane and Blackcondent. But who is the one who goes through? Our Patreons ask questions, and we answer!

  • Pirate Round 4

    September 9, 2026 · 51 min

    The final quarter final we have a close round of 5: Condent, North, Rackham, Kidd and Low go head to head. but only two can go through!

  • Pirate Round 3

    August 26, 2026 · 1 hr 4 min

    In the 3rd of the 4 rounds, we have Robin Hood Black Bellamy, Pirate King Vane, Gentleman Pirate Bonnet and Grandfather of piracy Avery. It is a round of death. only 2 can go through!

  • Pirate Round 2

    August 5, 2026 · 57 min

    In the second round Black Bart goes up agianst Howard, Davies and Tew! All very good pirates, but only two can go through. (Thats two, not Tew. but maybe Tew)

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  • Pirate Round 1

    July 29, 2026 · 58 min

    We start the rounds to see who is the best and most piratey pirate around! Blackbeard v Halesy v Bonney v Read! Which 2 will go through?

  • The Pirate Rounds - Draw

    May 27, 2026 · 18 min

    So we come to the end - and that means one thing! The Pirate Rounds! Let's see who the best pirate of them all is! In this short episode we draw the names.

  • 30 William Fly

    April 29, 2026 · 44 min

    We come to our last pirate! William Fly is often considered the last pirate of the Golden Age. But why Fly? did he do something amazing? Or was he a damp squib.

  • 29 Francis Spriggs

    April 15, 2026 · 58 min

    Ned Low was a bit of a git. But what about his right hand man? Well, probably a git as well. but maybe in a different way? find out!

  • 28 Ned Low

    April 1, 2026 · 1 hr 15 min

    We come to one of the most vicious of all pirates in the golden age. But was this a myth? Was he really that bad? And did he just want to be a lumberjack?   Also: Link to Marco's graphic novel mentioned in the episode…

  • 27. John Philips

    March 18, 2026 · 1 hr 1 min

    So, we don't get much on John Philips, but we do get a man to talk about him whose family we have come across before! Can you guess who? Can Jamie?

  • 26 John Evens

    February 25, 2026 · 19 min

    His episode is short, but maybe he is a hidden gem? Maybe?

Full episode archive on Apple Podcasts →

About the show

Lighthearted history podcast ranking all of the Golden Age Pirates. Brought to you by the same people who created Roman Emperors Totalus Rankium and American President Totalus Rankium