Fiction

Don’t Touch Anything

by Dont Touch Anything

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Latest episodes

Episode 10. The Great Fire of Londinium

October 11, 2026 · 34 min

Captain Wardle and Lieutenant Taylor travel to 17th century London to soak in the culture. Guest staring; Stacey Pannett as Mabel. Dawn Brocklehurst as Lucy the bar babe. Robert Green as Fred the mugger. Written and performed by…
Episode 9. Dinosaurs

September 14, 2026 · 27 min

Plunging back 66 million years into the Cretaceous, the crew explores a lost world. Season 2, Episode One. Written and performed by Christian Taylor-Hughes as Captain Chris. Produced and performed by Alfie Measures Wardle as…
Episode 8.5 The Hollow Signal

September 14, 2026 · 1 hr 43 min

The year is 2840, the United Earth Navy is fighting a war across the stars. Lieutenant Wardle and Flight Officer Bell are assigned to investigate a mysterious transmission originating beyond the known systems - but not all signals are…
Episode 8. Genghis Khan

July 3, 2026 · 33 min

Under their own initiative, Captain Wardle and Lieutenant Taylor travel to Mongolia to arrest Genghis Khan for SA. (Season One Finale) Written, produced and voiced by - Christian Taylor-Hughes as Captain Chris Alfie Measures-Wardle as…
Episode 7. Roswell

June 21, 2026 · 29 min

The ships crew head to New Mexico to investigate reports of an alien encounter. Guest staring - Antony Taylor-Hughes as Colonel William Blanchard. William Goldie-Galloway as Goldie the killer robot. All original music by Alvin…

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Episode 6. Baby Hitler

May 31, 2026 · 30 min

Breaking with precedent, the ships crew attempt to change the course of World War Two. Guest staring Professional fighter - William Goldie-Galloway - as 'Goldie' the killer robot. Jack Brocklehurst - as Sergeant Fritz Sean and Caylee…
Episode 5. Titanic

May 18, 2026 · 31 min

Along with their new colleague, the crew visit RMS Titanic on her maiden voyage. Guest staring Jack Brocklehurst as Officer Lowe + Deck Steward. All original music by Alvin Marriott. All licensed music by Epidemic Sou…
Episode 4. Pompeii

May 4, 2026 · 20 min

Captain Wardle and Lieutenant Taylor travel to the ancient city of Pompeii to settle an argument, picking up a a new friend along the way.. Written by - Christian Taylor Hughes (Captain Chris) Audio and production by - Alfie…
Episode 3. Pyramids

April 19, 2026 · 22 min

Naval pilots Wardle and Taylor travel to Ancient Egypt to discover who built the Pyramids and how. Written by - Christian Taylor Hughes (Captain Chris) Audio and production by - Alfie Measures-Wardle (Lieutenant Taylor) All original…
Episode 2. Moon Landing

April 19, 2026 · 24 min

After acquiring a functioning Time Machine, Captain Wardle and Lieutenant Taylor travel back in time to witness the moon landings first hand.. Written by - Christian Taylor Hughes (Captain Chris) Audio and production by - Alfie…
Episode 1. Docking

April 19, 2026 · 19 min

While carrying out a routine delivery, Federal Navy pilots Captain Wardle and Lieutenant Taylor discover an anomalous signal. Don’t Touch Anything is a sci-fi comedy audio drama set in the year 3026, following two Federal Navy pilots who…